


Fog control

by Grey1227



Category: Sports RPF
Genre: Brotherly Love, Gen, Hurt/Comfort, Injury, M/M, Oral Fixation, Panic Attacks, Sibling Love
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-12-08
Updated: 2020-12-08
Packaged: 2021-03-10 01:27:45
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,895
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27962264
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Grey1227/pseuds/Grey1227
Summary: After losing the AFC championship and breaking the Steelers’ perfect winning streak, TJ Watt begins to fall prey to his own mind. JJ is there to help him through the fog.
Relationships: TJ Watt & JJ Watt, TJ Watt/JJ Watt





	Fog control

**Author's Note:**

> This has been in my drafts forever, but it seems more appropriate now that the Steelers lost their streak. 
> 
> You can look at this as sibling incest or just regular sibling love.
> 
> There is actually oral fixation jewelry — chewelry.

TJ Watt walked through the airport like a man in a dream, vaguely aware of the pain in his arm. He didn’t really even remember getting on the plane, let alone the flight. His mind was hazy — not the warm, comforting white fog he felt when he was with his brothers. No, TJ was anything but at peace. Flashes of the game went through his head — bad plays, fumbles, turnovers, injuries... the Steelers had blown their perfect winning streak at the AFC championship. There would be no Super Bowl game for the Steelers.

TJ remembered the locker room after the game, silent except for the sniffling of some of his more openly hurt teammates. The physio had just set his broken arm and put it in a sling. His brother Derek was sitting next to Ben Rothelisberger nursing a badly bruised arm and a cloudy look. The look of utter disappointment on his older brother and their quarterback made TJ want to crawl under the ground and hide. Black had begun to creep into the grey.

TJ described the turmoil in his mind as being fog of different colors, white when he was happy and content, grey when beginning to worry and panic, black when he is truly beating himself up or losing touch with reality. 

Derek was the one who had suggested he return home to Wisconsin — noticing the subtle trembling in his little brother’s body — that dangerous, glazed look in his eye. He insisted TJ take a plane and get home to their oldest brother as soon as possible — Derek would take care of everything in Pittsburgh and be home as soon as he could.

TJ’s older brothers were always better at telling when their baby brother was getting into his head or having an episode than he was.They would help him fight off those black thoughts and keep him from beating himself up. JJ — ever the big brother — was the best at what the brothers had taken to calling fog control. 

DJTDJTDJTDJTDJTDJT

If JJ was honest he was scared to see what state his brother would be in when he stepped off the plane. JJ had watched the whole game — had watched his brothers all season. It hurt to see his brothers beaten during any game, but seeing them lose a perfect winning streak right before the Super Bowl? It was heartbreaking. He knew his brothers would need him—TJ especially wouldn’t handle the loss well.

JJ’s fears were confirmed when he saw his little brother walk towards him. TJ was way deep in his head, his body moving on autopilot while his mind chewed him up. It took JJ several times to gain his brother’s attention long enough ask where his bags were. TJ’s only response was a slow shake of his head, JJ was alarmed to find his brother only brought his phone, wallet, and his own dazed self on the plane back to Wisconsin. JJ sent a quick text to Derek telling him TJ made it home and asking him to collect their little brother’s things when he gets ready to come back. 

Focusing back on the task at hand, JJ guided his brother to the car, taking care to not hurt his brother’s injured arm. Making sure TJ was safely buckled in, JJ pulled the car away from the small Waukesha airport and began heading home. 

The drive was silent, TJ sat in his seat stiff as a board, staring at nothing. JJ did not want to say anything until they were back in the safety of their home, where he could give his youngest brother 100% of his time, energy, and attention. Still, JJ would periodically look over to check on TJ — his silence was starting to scare him. After stopping at one of the longer red lights, JJ took the time to really look his brother up and down, his eyes stopped at the flash of red by his brother’s hands. Looking closer, JJ realized with horror that his little brother had bit and gnawed on his nails and fingers until they were raw and bleeding. 

TJ had suffered from a severe oral fixation since childhood, but had grown to manage it through chewing gum or sun flower seeds. JJ even had a special necklace made that TJ could put in his mouth whenever he felt he had to. 

“Teej... where’s your necklace, bud?” JJ asked as gently as possible.

The light had turned green and they had already gone through two stop signs before TJ finally answered,

“Dropped it.” Was the simple, empty response. 

JJ made sure to drive a little over the speed limit.

The two brothers finally pulled into their driveway — JJ’s worry had only increased during the drive. He parked the car and quickly looked at his phone.

Der: How bad is he?

Me: Bad. He lost his necklace. He’s chewed his fingers raw I need to treat them before they get infected 

Der: Shit... is he talking?

Me: I only got two words out of him... it’s really bad... might be a code black, Der

As soon as JJ sent the last text he heard the front door of their house open. TJ had already got out of the car and headed to the house, leaving the car door open. JJ cursed himself for not paying attention, he quickly shut the car doors and ran up the stairs in pursuit of his brother. 

He found TJ standing motionless in the middle of the house. He looked like someone had shut the power off from his brain. 

TJ Watt was numb. Black thoughts choking his mind. His broken arm completely forgotten, the only sensation he could feel was the extreme pain in his chest, right at his heart. He felt like he was being choked, crushed, and stabbed all at once. He felt like his eyes were rolling back when he noticed a sound,

“...eej... —ent.... Trent!”

JJ saw his brother beginning to tremble and sway, he began to call out to him — he was unresponsive. Fearing his brother would fall, he grabbed TJ by his shoulder and spun him around so he could see his face. Calling TJ’s name again, JJ noticed a shift in his little brother’s eyes. Gone was the catatonic haze JJ was so afraid of — instead he saw the eyes of a frightened and broken boy. 

“JJ?” 

The hoarse whisper was followed by a choking gasp and TJ fell head first into the taller blonde’s chest. JJ was quick to move his brother to the living room couch. He arranged themselves so that his little brother was setting on his lap, sobbing heavily into his shoulder while he held him close.

JJ let his little brother sob for about five minutes straight without saying anything, just rubbing his back and kissing his head. Finally, JJ took hold of his brothers head and made him look him in the eye,

“Teej, you gotta tell me what’s going through your head so I can help you. Can you do that for me, baby?” 

JJ knew his little brother was upset about the game — any athlete would be — but TJ had the bad habit of being extremely hard on himself as well as being a perfectionist. JJ always feared this would happen.

“We lost the game!” TJ said between gasps and sobs

“I know, babe, I know — I saw it,” he placed a kiss on his brother’s neck, “but what else?” 

TJ had to come to the conclusion himself or else this would never work — this could sometimes take hours, but luckily JJ had infinite patience when it came to his brothers. 

“We can’t go to the Super Bowl!” TJ’s sobs only got more intense, his breathing more ragged.

“I know, baby, I’m so sorry, but that’s not really what’s got you upset is it?”

At that TJ finally broke... a heartbreaking whine began in his throat until he finally wailed, “I fucked everything up! I messed up all the plays, all the tackles, I was useless!” TJ was trembling now, “I messed everything up and now coach and Derek and Ben and all the fans hate me and think I’m a failure!” JJ had finally gotten the truth out of his little brother. 

“Teej that’s not true at all, you know we all care about you no matter what ha—”

“Liar!” TJ screamed, jumping out of JJ’s lap, “you hate me now! You can’t love me, I’m just a failure! I’m pathetic! You don’t love me!” TJ was screaming himself hoarse. 

Every word cut JJ, how could TJ be so deep in his head to believe that he didn’t love him — his own brother? JJ was about to respond when TJ crumpled to the ground gasping for air. 

“Shit!” JJ cursed, he quickly picked up his little brother and carried him to the bedroom. TJ was having a full-blown panic attack, if he didn’t calm him quickly he was afraid he’d have to take him to the hospital. 

TJ was completely unaware of his big brother carrying him to their room. The blackness in his head felt like it was spreading down into his lungs, clogging everything up as he gasped for air. He could feel it spreading in his veins as his heart pounded. He felt like he was dying. 

TJ was about to give into the black voices in his head when he felt something at his mouth. By pure instinct he latched on to whatever it was as if it was the only thing in the world. When TJ finally opened his eyes he saw his big brother gazing down on him lovingly. TJ realized they were in their bed, stripped down to their boxers, and he had JJ’s nipple in his mouth. 

JJ was relieved when he saw his brother open his eyes. They laid there in silence, JJ petting his brother’s hair while TJ focused on his breathing and his brother’s tit in his mouth. After a few minutes the dark black clouds in TJ’s head gave way to grey, and glimmers of that comforting white he felt when he was with his brothers. JJ knew now was the time to talk to his brother.

“I know how bad you feel Teej, I know you feel really small, like everything is awful, but it’s not true. You are one of the best athletes in the NFL — we are all so proud of you.”

TJ looked at his brother with shock, “You mean that? You still love me?”

“Trent Jordan, how can you ask that? Of course I do, you’re my baby brother! I love you and Derek more than anything, you are everything to me!”

TJ realized how dumb he was being — how could he ever doubt that his brothers love him. He always did this… overreact and act like a fool, he was nothing but a burden.

“Hey, hey, I know you’re calling yourself stupid right now — don’t!” 

TJ blushed, leave it to his brother to read his mind.

JJ gave his brother a gentle kiss, “now you just relax and take a nap, I’ll give you a bath later — might even put some bubbles in there if you’re a good little bro”

TJ smiled and dozed off, safe in the arms of his big brother — safe in that warm white haze.


End file.
